I have been writing things on the internet for other peoples enjoyment for twenty two years now. The first time was when I was eighteen years old. It was a website I created with another person who now hates me called K.R.A.P. I don’t know what it stands for and I am personally glad it was wiped off the face of the internet. My idea of a good funny post was just to yell obscenities and call the characters gay and say everything sucked. It was cringy and terrible and I hope never to see any of it again. I still have problems looking at stuff I wrote for this blog when I started in 2020 (wow who knew I would do it for that long) and that’s where this comes in. This is me trying to re-do awful awful blog posts from the past. I will not remove the original Power Rangers final episode but I will talk about the ACTUAL final Episode. You see they changed it to Mighty Morphin Alien Rangers for like ten episodes for some reason. I guess I had planned on reviewing that one too but never got around to it, until now!
So this is my favorite part. I don’t know why but I’ve kinda grown to love writing the history of the thing I’m talking about. It’s just nice. I dunno. Anyway Mighty Morphin Power Rangers like most amazing things comes from the LAND OF THE RISING SUN, Japan. They started a series of shows under the banner of Super Sentai. It’s like any superhero team show is under this banner. It started in 1975. that’s right. Power Rangers techinally goes back half a century now. That makes a man feel old. I’m going to take a nap. Uh, okay. Here’s wheres things get interesting. Apparenly some time in the 1980s Stan Lee found out about this stuff and wanted to bring it over but no one would listen to him. Weird ain’t it. Anyway some time again in the 1980s someone took seven episodes of the seventh Super Sentai series, Dynaman and turned it into……..Dynaman! It was a parody that aired on Night Flight and once on Nickoledon’s Special Delivery. I bet portnoyd remembers Special Delivery and making a soap box derby car with his dad. Portnoyd is older than I am and will turn to dust soon enough. I will miss him even if he is a jerk.
Dynaman was a failure. I have not seen any of it but apparently most of the jokes were HOHOHO THE JAPANESE CAN’T SAY L WORDS CORRECTLY HOHOHO not to say that I am a perfect angel who has never made that joke but I think it being every single joke is a bit much. Who knows, maybe this person was just wrong about it and I might enjoy Dynaman. I might end up watching it but I want to watch like 893410391059104 other thigns too. Yet none of those things are prestige tv like Mad Men or Breaking Bad. WEIRD HUH.
Anyway in the early 1990s, a man named Haim Saban who with his partner Shuki Levy wrote the theme songs to just about every cartoon ever made by DiC and about 90% of the rest of them created Saban Entertainment (who knows it might have been made earlier I dunno I’m too lazy to check this shit) and started to dub some animes (like Samurai Pizza Cats) and then saw Super Sentai and Saved by the Bell on a raging bender and was like WOAH IF I MASH THESE TWO THIGNS TOGETHER I’LL BECOME A JILLIONAIRE. and thats how Mighty Morphin Power Rangers was born! I can remember the first time I ever saw this show because for some reason people were trying to sell drugs behind my house! You see you could get into the fence behind our house and do things like that. I remember my mom talking to them. It was weird. I do remember being into the show for quite some time but honestly according to the internet, shitty parents who want to raise everyones children and cause a stink about the shows “violence” and wanting all children to watch fucking Davey and Goliath shit. I don’t want claymation dogs at this moment! I wanted giant fucking dinosaur robots FUCKING SHIT UP. Jesus. Raise your own stupid kids and stop being jerks. It was removed from YTV and I guess I just didn’t see all that much of Power Rangers. I swear I saw some Power Rangers Zeo on YTV but the YTV Schedule Wiki says no and I’m not going to argue with them. That’s almost as pointless as arguing with politics with anyone on twitter. If you don’t agree with them 100% you are the enemy and also evil. The old internet was not perfect but my god the worst parts of it are still better than this.
Now we finally get to my first post on this. I do not know how the hell I wrote something so saucy and angry about this. I don’t know why I was so grumpy. I’m guessing portnoyd or NES bounty related things. I miss the NES Bounty but I know that I am not allowed to do things like that. It messes up my mind and makes me a jerk. Uh, so here we are now. Finally ready to talk about the last two episodes (yep a Two PARTER!) of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers known as “Hogday Afternoon, Part I and II”
So uh, First off, I’m sure I mentioned it in the other post on Power Rangers but uh, I did not realize that they changed the cast this early. I thought it was the original cast until Zeo. I don’t know when I got out of Power Rangers but I guess it was before this episode. Anyway, the Power Rangers are all uh children now and not TEENAGERS WITH ATTITUDE, except for Tommy and Billy. Tommy was the best Power Ranger and I don’t want to argue. If you disagree you can shove that argument right up your butt. ALL THE WAY UP THERE. They are also working with another group of Rangers called the Alien Rangers who sound weird and annoying. I already do not like them. I am grumpy and old.
Another Power Ranger named Aisha is out in the Desert in Africa or some place with Lions. She needs to find something to fix the Zeo Crystal. Rita and Lord Zedd (best part of the episode) send the Hydro Hog to steal all the water on earth. The Hydro Hog kinda reminds me of a blue Grimace from McDonalds. I like the Hydro Hog. The Hydro Hog removes all the water from the Alien Rangers. Aisha is stuck in the desert AFTER DARK with CRAZY ANIMALS GONE NUTS FROM A RANDOM SICKNESS. Goldar and Johnny Skeleton (I don’t know this characters actual name) get ready to blow up the entire Command Center! Of course all of this is easily rectified in the next episode. The Alien Rangers get water, Aisha finds the final Zeo Crystal!!!! and then they do the best part of most Power Ranger episodes is when they grow to giant size and start FUCKING SHIT UP. The Alien Rangers zord looks really dumb. It has a giant origami goose on its head. The flaming sword is fucking awesome though.
They have to get some help from the FALCON ZORD to beat up the Hydro Hog, but they do. Aisha gives the Zeo Crystal to her friend and joins the people in the Desert, she becomes the next Power Ranger. However the bomb that Goldar and Johnny Skeleton (who apparently is Rita Repulsa’s brother!) steal the Zeo Crystal and escape. The Power Rangers escape barely and then look and see the Command Center HAS EXPLODED and we don’t know what has happened to Zordon or Alpha Five! Thankfully unlike every other cliffhanger ending this one did get resolved in Power Rangers Zeo.
FINAL THOUGHTS: I liked Power Rangers a lot as a kid. I was the perfect age for it. 8 years old. It was one part Saved by the Bell and one part goofy monster crap. I ate it up like there was no tomorrow and I did have fun with this. I mean it’s kinda hard not to have a least a little bit of fun with it. However, I just wish that the entire team of original Power Rangers were there and not just some randos I never watched as a kid. Still it makes me want to watch some more Power Rangers and that’s something. Anyway, have yourself a good day and let’s get outta here.
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