Let’s Watch Every Movie Ever Made Even Though It’s Not Possible Really Part 4. I think. Maybe Part 5. I dunno.

 Yep. We are back after almost a week of no discussion with TWO new blog posts! Wild huh! Anyway I watched four movies I had never seen before and you know the drill, It’s time to talk about those four movies. So let’s get to it before we all get gray hair and wrinkles! And I mean face wrinkles not those dog toys from the 1980s that were like Pound Puppies. Yes This is the worst opening paragraph to anything you will ever read. I am proud I was able to do that.

9.) Project A (1983)

Whenever you are unsure of what to watch, Jackie Chan is always a good bet. I’m almost through his filmography and this isn’t even the only movie he’s been a part of on this list. Anyway this movie’s plot is very uh all over the place. He starts out a sailor, than has to be a police man, then quits being a police man, then messes up stuff involving the police, then fights gangsters, then becomes a sailor again and fights pirates. It’s all over the place. It’s actually quite funny because no matter what the plot of the other stories were they were kept simple. Although talking about a plot of a Jackie Chan movie is quite stupid because you aren’t there for a plot you’re there to watch Jack Chan whip ass like there was no other and he whips an INCREDIBLE amount of ass in this film. It’s pretty amazing to watch. Sammo Hung is also really good comedic relief who can also kick ass when needed. I might have to check out more of HIS movies now. Who could say no to a movie entitled Enter the Fat Dragon?!?

10.) Deadlier Than the Male (1967)

Now this was an absolute hoot and a half of a movie. It’s like James Bond but starring detective Bulldog Drummond from another different series of books. This one has him fighting a guy who has a ton of beautiful sexy sixities babes running around killing big name people like oil tycoons and stuff. Why? So the bad guy can make money! I must say that I was surprised by this movie. It’s a lean, mean but not green (that’s the next movie!) spy thriller. It never gets too bogged down with being to serious or plot heavy. Just a good ol’ time at the movie theatre. Richard Johnson is incredibly entertaining as Hugh “Bulldog” Drummond and he was even gonna be James Bond before Sean Connery showed up! I wish they had made more of these movies. Everyone works incredibly well in this movie and it’s a very amusing action packed affair!

11.) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

This is the second of the Jackie Chan movies. Yep, Jackie Chan is the new Splinter and he’s kinda actually great as him. Even if he still isn’t great with English despite making movies in Hollywood since like I dunno the 1980s? Doesn’t matter because he’s a lot of fun. In fact this entire movie is a lot of fun. I love the animation style (which was from the same company and team of people that did The Mitchells Vs. the Machines which was a really great movie too). I actually really enjoyed the fact that the characters were played by actual Teens this time. I enjoyed seeing so many mutants from the original show. This is probably the best TMNT movie since the original film in 1990. Maybe since TMNT II: Secret of the Ooze. Totally better than the Michael Bay sequel that had that shithead as Casey Jones. Oh god he was so fucking bad. Anyway the only real problem I had with this movie is that it has a lot of references to new popular things that will probably date this movie in ten or so years but hey It’s still a lot of fun in the here and now.

12.) Some Girls Do

Yep. I liked Deadlier than The Male so much I decided to watch the sequel a few days later! Anyway this movie was not as good as the first but still definetly worth a looksee if you enjoy this kinda movie. The problems I had was well, they changed actors for the bad guy character. The guy in the first movie was SO much better. Elke Sommer and her henchlady were also way more fun to watch too. Also the comic relief character was pretty annoying where as the comic relief character in the first movie was pretty good. Still this movie has fembots and Richard Johnson just being a cool badass mother fucker. Why do we call people who are cool and bad ass mother fuckers? You shouldn’t fuck your mother and you shouldn’t be fucking mothers. It’s weird. Stop it. Uh, where was I? Oh yeah, this movie was still a lot of fun but they didn’t quite capture the charm of the original movie. Still I would have watched another movie in this series but I guess that wasn’t to be.

Join me next time as I watch something that will make me puke blood and then yell about it on here. I gotta pick at least one movie to be shitty too because man It’s hard to write positive funny reviews and this is where you say “wait this stuff was supposed to be funny?” and we all laugh until there’s a freeze frame.