Movie Review #5: Primal Rage (1988)

 

If you told me I had to write an article (or series of articles) about 100 things that I think are amazing and cool and the best ever, Italian Movies would be on that list. Not just for their amazing Horror Films by individuals like Lucio Fulci and Dario Argento, but for their crazy as hell action films, post apocalyptic movies, and sword and sorcery stuff. Any crazy fuckin thing can and will happen in Italian cinema. They don't give a damn as long as they give the viewer what they want. You want crazy ass horror or action or whatever then start watching Italian movies sucker!

This is the first Vittorio Rambaldi movies that I've seen, and sadly he isn't as prolific as say Bruno Mattei because this was a kick ass movie and I would have watched more of his stuff. The movies plot is pretty gosh darn simple really. A doctor is trying to help people by messing with monkey's brains for some reason or another. Don't ask me, I didn't write this movie, Umberto Lenzi did. However the shit makes the monkey freak out and later on, a newspaper reporter for a college comes to this place and the monkey bites him. He ends up biting a date during some smooching (and she doesn't immediately run away for some reason) and well you know where this is going, they both turn into crazed violent lunatics that only want to murder. Not only them but 3 frat boy rapists do too. So it's now up to another reporter guy from the college and his girlfriend to stop it all. Note I didn't mention the Doctor because he gets killed. Poor Bo Svenson.

This was a very fun motion picture that I highly recommend you check out. It has some very likable characters that you will end up rooting for, and feeling bad when they die, unlike a lot of newer horror films where you don't give a dickhole of a shit about the characters. It moves at a nice fast pace like a thrill ride! It has some crazy ass death scenes in it too. I don't want to ruin them but man the ending 20 minutes is enough for you crazy gore people! This movie even has mentions of Alf, Spuds Mackenzie AND The Noid! I'd have given it a high rating just on that alone!

FINAL VERDICT: I had another ending in mind before I checked and yes this movie was on DVD. And even Blu-Ray. I was going to talk about how movies shouldnt be left to languish on VHS, and I guess that's still true, they shouldn't. All movies are a part of film history weither you like that or not. The TV-REMAKE of The Absent Minded Professor and Care Bears in Wonderland are pieces of film history and should be on blu-ray. Fuck you if you think any movie should be forgotten, even shitty ones like RV.