Ah, Television. A favorite uh I guess pass time of many people. Myself included. I mean okay yeah I don't really watch any movie or tv show on the TV any more, but I just might start doing it now that I do have a TV that can show a computer screen. I don't know why I am blathering this all to you. I am going to be posting about things I hate because while I like to be positive about this whole thing I still have things that drive me up the wall and now I will give Bratwurst three more things to annoy me with. It will be a hoot and a holler and we will all go to bed happy. Except me. Because of Bratwurst. Anyway I hope you enjoy desending into TV's butthole with me. I will have a good time tearing this shit down.
Yes. I watched this show more than I really should have. I would watch it on CBS because It was in between Cosby and the King of Queens. Yes, I watched Cosby. Yes, I know he's a bad person but I was 11 fucking years old at the time and just found him and Doug E Doug (remember him. I miss him) were funny together. I'm sure if I get the ability to go back in time I will make sure to beat myself for watching something made by a bad person. Enough sarcasm over that whole thing. I remember watching a way too political YouTube video by someone. I don't even remember if this person was liberal or conservative, I just know that they had RAYS WIFE on. I forget the actresses name and no I don't give enough of a shit to go back and check. She was complaining about the writers of the show being POLITICALLY CORRECT. No I'm not going to get into a argument about that because AT THE RIPE OLD AGE OF 40 I've found out that a lot of political things have nuance to them. It's almost never a cut and dry kinda thing. Anyway this surprised me so much because I did not realize this show had writers. I thought someone wrote one script AND THEY FUCKING XEROXED IT 200 FUCKING TIMES. This was THE most formulaic thing ever. Every sitcom and cartoon and whatever from the past at least decided to mix the formula up. EVEN POLICE ACADEMY AND FRIDAY THE 13TH SEQUELS mixed the formula up at one point. Not Raymond. Every single fucking episode was about RAY DOING SOMETHING STUPID and HIS SHITTY WIFE YELLING AT HIM. I could maybe let that slide if the characters were at any time FUNNY. You can have dickhead characters JUST MAKE THEM FUNNY. Everyone in this show, even the ones played by talented people (like his brother, his dad and his mom) were just obnoxious. I remember being excited for one episode because it would mention Pokemon and I was big into Pokemon at 15. You know what. THEY DIDN'T SHOW ANY POKEMON OR ANY POKEMON CARDS and just talked about them. HOLY SHIT DID THAT EVER PISS ME OFF MORE THAN IT SHOULD. Anyway, I even talked about the Final Episode of this show and it was terrible. I hate this garbage.
You know the saddest thing about this show is that if they got rid of Ross I might have watched it. The rest of the cast were pretty good and did pretty good things in other movies and tv shows. I had no problem with any of them and still watch new things they appear in. Jennifer Anniston is like 60 and still somehow sexy as hell. And yes I will bring up the fact that she was in QUANTUM LEAP and LEPRECHAUN. The very first one. I really should do an article on the LEPRECHAUN films. Or even at least review one of them. I just fucking hate the character of Ross from this show. He is a whiny baby that makes everyone on Everybody Loves Raymond look like I dunno some fun characters. I guess I will pick the Ninja Turtles. Yes, Ross makes everyone on Everybody Loves Raymond look like the Ninja Turtles. The Idea of Brad Garret dressed up as a Ninja Turtle is very funny to me. Ross and Rachel kinda ruined the character of Rachel too because ANY HUMAN BEING SHOULD NOT WANT TO BE AROUND ROSS EVER FOR ANY AMOUNT OF TIME. I just remembered that Ross had a monkey and HIS SHITTY CHARACTER AND DAVID SCHWIMMER'S SHITTY ACTING RUINED COMEDY WITH A MONKEY. HOW THE HELL CAN ANYONE DO THAT? Fuck Ross and fuck this show.
I remember my parents first comments when they found out that I did not like this show. They were like OH ITS NOT AN OLD THING SO MICHAEL DOESN'T LIKE IT. HE'LL LIKE IT IN TWENTY YEARS. Well guess what MOTHER AND FATHER it's almost twenty years since this hunk of shit came on the air and I still fucking hate it. I really really really fucking hate this show. Oh god do I ever hate this fucking show. First off, I feel the character of Sheldon is a mean spirited look at Autistic people. I hate him so much. I also kinda hate the term nerd blackface so I won't use it. I also remember seeing an episode where one character jokes about how he wished Alf would have brought him to Melmac and I'M LIKE MELMAC BLEW THE FUCK UP YOU SHITHEAD. The whole reason I hate this joke and this show is that it feels like it's making fun of all the goofy shit that I love instead of making jokes about it. I can make jokes about Alf and Spider-Man and all kinds of goofy shit but they aren't mean spirited or uh INCORRECT. That also makes me believe that these characters are not nerdy at all. A nerd would know EVERYTHING about a thing. It doesn't matter if it was Alf or Spider-Man or Star Trek or Science or whatever the fuck. Nerds literally try to learn everything about something they like or love. That one joke made the entire show ring hollow to me. They also have LOL NERDS CAN'T GET DATES HAOHHOAHOAHOAHAOHAHOAH the 1950s called and they want their joke back you shitheads. I really really hate this show and it annoys me greatly. This show has over 200 episodes and I can think of like many shows that deserved that, or hell even at least just one more season. I think I picked the 2000 end off date for the Final Episode JUST so I would NEVER have to talk about this shows Final Episode and I'm glad I did do that because I'm sure THE HOOLIGANS I TALK TO WOULD TRY TO MAKE ME WATCH THIS. This show is the equivilant of NES game collectors wanting ORIGINAL FOAM in their COMPLETE IN BOX games. Which means it's incredibly fucking stupid and worthless.
I will come back to this topic from time to time so I can SHIT ON SOME GARBAGE. We will all have a great time.
I totally support tearing crappy TV a new asshole.
ReplyDeleteCosby was funny. I doubt he's funny now because it's likely he's more of a grumpy old black guy than anything. But the Cosby Show was like the prototypical sacchrine sitcom. There's a reason why Married with Children was originally named Not The Cosbys. The uptight internet will get their panties in a bunch about this, but he was highly influential in the 80s. Don't feel bad about it at all.
I'll be honest, I have never seen an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond. Ray Romano is a terrible comedian and as boring as you can get, so I did not watch his show. However, I totally agree that your assessment is correct. One thing that Cosby also did was run the gamut of every sitcom plot imagineable. So Raymond having copycat plots is no surprise.
They should have made a show called Everybody Hates Schwimmer because everyone does hate Schwimmer. He's pretty annoying. I don't think I've ever encountered a person who was like THIS SHOW NEEDS ROSS. No. No it doesn't.
Friends itself is... ok. I watched some of it. It had its moments like CHANANDLER BONG. Matthew Perry was actually funny which helped, but man, the 2 movies he made were kind of awful. The rest of the cast was pretty disposable especially Lisa Kudrow. Fun ancedote: just got a new TV and in a first for smart TVs, it had an option to make it dumb. But I entered my wifi info which made it think OH YOU WANT SMART TV GOT IT. So I had to reset it. But before then, on the home screen, it had a picture of Kudrow with a GIANT FAKE SMILE. And this is a 100" TV so her head was like 5 feet tall. Gross.
Wow, tell your parents to eat shit. You are allowed to not like popular things, especially ones that are essentially LOOK AT DA FUNNY NERDS HAR HAR HAR. I still don't know how this shit heap got popular. It should have been instantly canceled. In fact, if it was put on TV 20 years earlier, it would have because in 1987, nerds were still nerds and not popular or interesting or wanted anywhere.
That thing about Alf really sums it up. It's so stereotypical and they can't even get it right. Because they don't care nor does the audience because the audience is trying to limbo under the lowest possible bar without falling over and enjoying every second of it.
Nah, it's not NES foam, it's the exact opposite. It's going into a game store and asking for NINTENDO. Not the Switch, Game Boy, WiiU, anything. Just "Nintendo" & feeling you are a REAL GAMER doing so. Wanting the original foam would be an actual nerd thing that these fake nerds don't even approach.
Please continue to shit on topics like this. We shall do it together.
You know I was going for a THIS IS AS LAME AS NINTENDO FOAM thing but your little ramble there is much more apt. I hate calling people fake because who died and made me the judge of that, however if they were real people I would call all four of those stupid assholes in this show fakes. It was just the laziest shit imaginable when it came to comedy. I really don't like it or any Chuck Lorre show. Chuck Lorre did two things I like, writing for HEATHCLIFF the cartoon and writing the theme song to the Ninja Turtles cartoon, everything he made thta was live action was awful. Grace Under Fire, Dharma and Greg, Two and a Half Men, so bad in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteI would wtach a movie that LISA KUDROW and MINA SURVANI or whatever her name was called ROMY AND MICHELLE'S HIGH SCHOOL REUNION a LOT as a child and I'm sure I would have positive feelings towards it if I were to re watch it. Very few things I don't have the same positive love for. I really only have so many things to go on when it comes to the FRIENDS group because they spent most of their acting time on that show and anytime Ross showed up I just turned the channel. They could be the greatest comedic actors of all time or hot awful shit but I will never know because of David Schwimmer.
It was kind of amazing how XEROXED Raymond was. It wouldn't have been as bad if it just wasn't funny. Listening to Raymond and Shitty Wife yell at each other was just so unpleasant. It's a shame because the supporting cast (his family) is actually full of pretty talented people)
I hopefully will do another one of these soon. Probably pick a few cartoons that piss me off.
Wow, I know nothing about Chuck Lorre and yes, all of those shows were terrible. I will not even give him a pass for the TMNT theme song because he did sing it, which is why it is so amazing. If he sung it, I retract that statement.
DeleteOh god, I remember that Romy and Michelle movie. I may have even seen it once. Lisa Kudrow can apparently do comedy but like, no thanks.
He wrote the lyrics/background music.
DeleteThat's all he's done that I can approve of really.