Yep, I’m back in the mood to just review NES, probably the next few posts could be NES game reviews but really who the hell knows with me? Thankfully we are done with the Baseball shit for a little while and just about every B game is at least somewhat interesting to talk about. This grouping has a game you either love or hate, a sequel to that game, a game based on a board game, an unlicensed game (which are kryptonite to Youtubers for some fucking reason) and an action RPG! What do I think of them! Well read on sonny boy!
Here it is, the game you either love (correct opinion) or hate (incorrect opinion). Personally I’m a big fan of BattleToads. The graphics and music are wonderful. The levels are nice and varied, always doing something different to keep it interesting. The biggest problem with this game is that it’s very, very, very hard. I will not argue that. I will say that YOU CAN get good at this game. If I CAN get to the Rat Race then ANYONE can. You just gotta stop being A LITTLE BITCH and MAN UP and play Rare’s most famous game (I mean behind the Donkey Kong Country games, but those are co-made with Nintendo) or you could be a big wiener who got so angry at this game in 1991 because THEY WEREN’T GOOD ENOUGH that you hate the game and everything Rare (one of the BEST companies to make NES games) made. Personally I am a BattleToads fan because I am cool AND good.
I will start this by saying that I think the vast majority of Turn based RPGs on the NES have aged like milk. I will get more into it later when I hit an actual Turn Based RPG but the Action RPGs, like Zelda or Startropics. I think every single one of them made for the NES well I still really like and think they are pretty high quality games. Battle of Olympus is pretty much a Zelda 2 clone that takes place in Ancient Greece. That’s always a fun place to put your fantasy story into! Apparently this game was ported to the gameboy by Radical Entertainment. I know they improved over the years and gave us cult hits like The Simpsons Hit and Run but HOLY SHIT did their early games suck. I will not be playing the gameboy port of this ever. Anyway the music in this game is sick and the graphics are pretty good too, even if they are clearly inspired by Zelda 2. Anyway, Battle of Olympus is a very good game that is worth playing. The challenge is pretty fair but has some really brutal as fuck moments but shit what NES game doesn’t?
More proof the Battle Toads are fucking cool as hell. Would the Double Dragons hang out with LAME-OS? No they fucking wouldn’t! So the fact they teamed up with the Battle Toads is PROOF enough that the Battle Toads and their games are both cool and good. This was a game I played quite a bit on the SNES with my sister way back in the day. It was always a good time. Even if we could never beat level 3. The NES version is also a good time. The challenge is toned down and it’s still pretty damn hard honestly. I can’t get past that one level that turns the game into like Asteroids or something on the Atari, just with better graphics. I’ll tell you this much I’d play any Battle Toads game over any Atari 2600/5200/7800/Jaguar game thats for sure. Fuck Atari. Anyway the graphics and music are excellent because Rare does good work with that stuff. Portnoyd is wrong and will make a wrong comment being a goober.
I think it’s pretty weird to make this into a NES game but hey they did it. Mindscape also made Monopoly (which I think was the only other board game turned NES game out there but I could be wrong oh yeah they made Pictonary too.) Anyway I like this game. It’s a pretty fun time I thinks. Probably not as good as playing two player or the board game but I still enjoyed playing through this game twice. It has pretty good music and the graphics are as good as you can get really for what they were going for. It’s really not a game you can really write an insane amount about. Either way I liked it.
I believe that this is our first Codemasters/Camerica game! Oh no! Unlicensed! if you are somehow a youtube lame-o or a NintendoAge lame-o you should shield your eyes! Save yourself! I will be doing something you won’t like! I’m going to praise this game as being a pretty decent little game! Based on some shit from the Commodore 64’s asshole (another system that can go fuck itself) we get a much better and more enjoyable port for the old NES. I used to dislike this game until I GOT GOOD. Nah, I had no idea what to really do and would die a lot. I figured out what to do and I still die a lot, except I can at least get to level 5 or 6 or something. You play as a Bee who has to get Honey back to his hive. You can get the Honey from three plants before you have to go back and drop the honey off. You can attack with your stinger (which somehow doesn’t kill you despite you being a Bee) and random weapon upgrades that you can get. This is a neat little fun game with fun music and mostly pretty well done level design. I think Codemasters/Camerica did a good job here!
That’s it. This time I actually liked all the games. Next time however, hooo boy. Maybe I wont be posting nothing but NES reviews! Either way here are the scores!
Good Games: 32
Bad Games: 26
Okay Games: 9
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