You think as someone who enjoys comic books so much you'd think I'd be happy that they are making so much comic book content but I'm kinda tired to hell about them. Yep weird huh. Even though I recently watched the old 80s/90s Batman movies (well not Batman and Robin, and still enjoy them so much more than the new stuff) but I thought to complain about them because it just came to my mind. I'm literally on a roll here with fucking blog posts I want to make. I'm actually having fun with the fucking internet again and that's amazing.
1.) Let's start with Marvel. I do not think they know what the hell they are doing at this point. I really really really do not know what they are doing. They seemed to have a idea pretty early on with Thanos and every movie felt connected to some degree making it exciting to see how the whole story would end. It felt like you had to see how the story ended up. Now a lot of these movies don't even feel connected at all. One does something with the multiverse. One is a literal prequel. One is a kung fu fantasy movie (which is really not as cool as the 1970s/1980s comic where he was a kung fu spy movie.) One is a weird mess that has been forgotten like the Eternals. One is a movie where the main characters actor died. I didn't hate any of these movies (except Eternals that boring drab ugly piece of shit can go fuck itself) None of these seem to connect and what made the movies fun was all of these characters coming together in one big thing in the end and the connectivity is gone. I also like Kang (he's got a convoluted history but I really enjoy a good amount of the stories he was in) and they seriously don't seem to really have an idea what the hell to do with him.
2.) DC is literally rebooting itself with this new Flash movie. They started their live action universe of movies in 2013. One decade of movies that was fucked up from the beginning because Zach Synder doesn't know shit about comic books or superheroes and should have fucked off somewhere. I do not know where but just away from these movies, but if you are going to jump and push the OH SHIT WE GOTTA START OVER button in a decade is not a good look. Rebooting shit too many times kinda keeps people out of caring. Yeah some of it was really awful but I did enjoy a good amount of DC movies but yeah they seem to be just starting all over. It's no good.
3.) Holy shit are they pumping these things out. Marvel now has 26 different TV series and 3029240 movies. I'm sorry but I don't have the fucking time to watch every one of these tv series (and the ones I watched I liked Hawkeye and She-Hulk. Even if Hawkeye clearly felt like it felt like an overlong movie than an actual TV series. I hear the other ones felt like that too and that's not a good thing. Just edit them into damn movies. It's embarrassing I swear.
4.) Everyone wants a piece of the pie. Some of these companies literally own the rights to the most obscure characters. Even ones I've never fucking heard of and I know too much about this stuff. I've forgotten more stuff about comic books than most people will ever know, and no that's not a brag. That's an admission I need to get laid. By literally any adult. Just pooping this out there without anyone who cares about the Diddly Daddly Man. Just to get some content for their streaming service.
5.) No one now wants to take a risk. If James Gunn came to Marvel now and was like Hey do you want to do a Guardians of the Galaxy movie now in 2024 they would look at him and go NO THOSE CHARACTERS ARE WEIRD AND SILLY. Despite those three movies probably being the absolute high point of the MCU. They really do not want to get too weird and silly with it. Yeah they let She-Hulk get a little goofy but there's so much weird shit in Marvel and DC Comics that is genuinely fun they will jump over it.
That's it. Comment to tell me I'm a poopie head or something for not being excited anymore for this stuff.
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I mostly agree with you but it wouldn't be a Port reply if it didn't make your crappy blog better and by better I mean me posting on it.
ReplyDeleteMarvel: Part of the problem is we became conditioned for continuity and it wasn't ready yet. It took a few years before Avengers as it was. Now after MASSIVE continuity, people think they need their fix. They don't. Enjoy the movies at face value.
Which is easier said than done because they've all been mediocre since Endgame (Guardians 3 was by far the best of the crop). That's what happens when you are stuck on your B and C team. Which could be worse because they could be...
DC: LOL. SHITTY GERBAGE. I will say The Flash looks mildly interesting but I'm not paying to see it.
Marvel Volume: They knew they went too hard on TV shows. They backed off dramatically. Also most have been unwatchable.
Crappy Characters: You have to remember how stupid people with money work. They can be convinced of anything if they think they can make more money. So if you scream SUPER HERO MEDIA, they'll go "where do I signc. These people have no idea about good comics (like Deadpool) work or why they are good, they just smell money. Kinda sounds like game collecting now too, huh?
Risks: They are definitely taking risks but they're getting stung so it'll taper off, but the Marvel and DC train will never stop moving. The resume, even DC's shitty one, will keep them being made. Batman alone and nothing else DC guaranteed that. No risk involved unfortunately because Batman and Marvel tentpoles will balance the books.
Also, Kang blows. Run him over with a cement mixer and make Doom the big bad.
Kang is great and has a lot of fun stories. I like his gimmick.
DeleteI don't want them touching what could be the greatest super villain ever created when they don't know what the bloody hell they are really doing at this point.
the Risks are taking something like The Eternals and then taking out all of the CRAZY JACK KIRBY SHIT and making it a dull pile of shit. That is still my least favorite Marvel film period.
Everyone hates Eternals. Everyone.
DeleteNah, there's some deluded sad weirdos out there that still pretend its a good movie and not a weird, boring and depressing thing.
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