Monday, December 6, 2021

Movie Review #70: Last Ounce of Courage (2012)

 


American Conservatives live in a fucking fantasy land. Not a fun fantasy land full of wizards and barbarians and giant man-bears. No a fucking stupid fantasy land where taking out a gun while IN the middle of a shooting will be seen as badass and not stupid. They believe they are fucking action stars in the movies, without realizing every part of those movies were faked. Sure Chuck Norris and Steven Segal and all them know how to fight and stuff but they can't take down a damn entire bar full of people who stop school shooters. The last Conservative movie I watched was Run, Hide, Fight and it was a delusional mess, but what else did you expect from Ben Shapiro's fucking movie company. that dude needs a damn wedgie. 

This movie is about the War on Christmas, a made up fake bull shit garbage thing made by pea brained idiots for pea brained idiots. This is a foolish, moronic movie and I hate it so much. It starts off with a guys son named Thomas going off to war and dying. His father takes this very hard. His grandson and son's wife comes back into his life and his grandson inspires him TO BRING CHRISTMAS BACK TO THIS TOWN. Yeah, no. People still fucking celebrate Christmas. Some government buildings may not want to put up religious stuff due to the whole SEPERATION OF CHURCH AND STATE that has been going on for a long fucking time. Seriously this movie pretends that no one has Christmas anymore. It's very very stupid. 

Oh and in one scene the stupid grandfather asshole says he wouldn't give up his war service for anyone. Yeah you know most individuals got traumatized by war right? And most of them would probably have wished a war not happen. What a dumb argument. Oh and two girls the sons age, like 14 or some shit are in a Winter Play and they play aliens instead of Angels. Yeah hilarious. Conservatives are also not funny. Really not funny. I hope something comes of this play because the kid actors are fucking horrendous  and I don't like them. Really don't like them. Although to be fair everyone is fucking terrible in this movie. There's also a random Biker gang that might be led by a midget. What the hell is this movie smoking and where can I get some?

What the FUCK. Fred Fucking Williamson is in this movie. as some TV anchor guy. Let's see if he makes Grandpa Mayor look like an idiot or not. Is he going to be the bad guy of the film?!?! I hope he has more than one scene because he is awesome and I may not end up with a massive headache from watching this movie.  OH SHIT THAT NASTY CHURCH AND STATE THING IS POPPING UP. FRED WILLIAMSON IS TELLING THE MAYORS FIRST IN COMMAND WHATEVER GUY TO TELL THE MAYOR TO TEAR DOWN THOSE DECORATIONS AND TO APOLOGIZE. OH GOD THIS MOVIE IS FUCKING HILARIOUS NOW ITS THAT DELUDED. HOLY SHIT.

The kids are now changing the Christmas Play! I don't know about you but their subplot is fucking BORING and I won't be talking about any more of it. At least the main plot with Mayor Grandpa is dementedly insane and I can't stop watching it. HAHAHAHA holy shit the Mayor Grandpa literally says "Not one RADIO STATION PLAYS TRUE CHRISTMAS MUSIC ANYMORE" oh my sweet baby Jesus.  Man this guy is such a whiny turd. Conservative Christians are all like WERE BEING TREATED LIKE SECOND CLASS CITIZENS! nah you aint' stop that shit you dopey FUCKS.

I'm too bored of this movie to talk about any more of it. It's bad and stupid and really dull too. Hahahaha wow I take it back. The evil FRED WILLIAMSON got his way and STATE AND CHURCH have to stay separate. now they are trying to say MAYOR GRANDPA wasn't a war hero after all! Oh my godddddd! This is clearly added horseshit to increase the running time to actual film length. He will find some metal that shows hes a hero and BLAH BLAH BLAH. lol even this movie has a WISE BLACK MAN in it. I like Wise black men. He is not played by either Bill Cobbs or Morgan Freeman.

Oh and so I don't forget the movie give him the last name of Revere. Yes like Paul Revere. The BRITISH ARE COMING guy. Yes this guy who put back up a Cross is so important. Jesus Christ this movies head is so far up its own asshole. 

FINAL VERDICT: If you believe in the War on Christmas, go outside to the nearest dumpster and start eating trash. You goober.

1 comment:

  1. MURICA FUCK YEAH *RUNS TO NEWFOUNDLAND AND PUNCHES CLAW IN THE HEAD WITH FREEDOMS*

    These movies are obnoxious but also very sad. It's proof positive that the people who are all MURICA have no creativity or sense of humor because they keep pumping out these bland, flavorless movies. They are all so straightforward, they hit you over the head with the subject matter and have no subtitlity. Why does comedy escape these people?

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