Comic Review #56: The Hellfire Gala (2021)

 

Alright some things off the start here. Yeah I'm still gonna talk about the remaining two DC Annuals from the 1990s. Well the remaining two I want to talk about. Then we are going to take a little break from annuals and after that break talk about a few Marvel did in the 1990s. Wouldn't that be fun? Also yes I will get back to the Final Episode soon, but I also kind of want to get the numbers of these two columns to match. I dunno. I like Synergy.  Also I felt like talking about this X-Men story that got a lot of heat from Twitter dummies. Yes I will be mentioning those lovely rascals known as Comicsgate again BUT I will also be yelling at some weirdo liberals who make the left wing look terrible. And discussion of a pretty great little comic. Since this is a pretty new era of the X-Men and some people are like me and like to have a big ol' pile of comics to read (I let weeks upon weeks of comics I get to pile up) I will mention that I will be spoiling this story like I usually do with any other comic I review. It's just most of those comics are old to very old. You had decades to read them.

Anyway I think I have to sum up the newest era of the X-Men as quick as possible. The X-Men are now living on Krakoa (yes the mutant island from Giant Size X-Men #1). It's become a Mutant nation and they are trying to get in good with the U.N. They have several new laws for the nation. Krakoa can even make drugs that cure any aliment that man can have. Just about everyone who is a mutant is allowed on the island no matter who they are. They can even get ressurected if they are a mutant. It's a very unique time for Marvel's merry mutants and I seriously can not get enough of it. People can complain about how many X-Men titles are being put out now (It's like 12 or so now lol) but I don't really care as I'm enjoying them all at least enough to keep buying them.

Now Emma Frost of the Hellfire Club wants to have a gala to show off the new X-Men team and also try to get in good with many many nations and stuff like that. This is where Comicsgate comes in, you see Comicsgate thinks that nothing happens but people drinking tea and loving each other throughout all comics these days. They've been lied to by weirdos on YouTube because uh, things happen. They think the comics are woke and they were very mad about this comic because the X-Men decided to look pretty for a gala with elegant and over the top costumes. They can be as mad as they want but I just want them all to go the fuck away from YouTube so I can watch things related to nerdy shit without getting their stupid videos recommended to me. One this works in canon because Emma Frost is the kind of lady that wants to look good and WANTS YOU TO LOOK GOOD AT HER PARTY. you don't come in looking like a damn unshaven hobo at a party of hers. Also two this is a comic book where people already dress in brightly colored over the top costumes. Why not have a little bit of fun with that and the whole gala thing.

Now let's discuss some of the things that happened in these comics: 1.) A group of ambassadors from Terra Verda. Beast who is now a completely insane shithead and not a goof ball (which I can't say I'm a big fan of honestly but characters change sometimes?) pretty much due to some wild comic book nonsense mind controls the ambassadors and main government of this place. Emma Frost finds out and that's not good. She gets this mutant named Sage to turn off the mind control. This of course causes the Terra Verdaeans to turn into crazy plant creatures because it's a comic book. This story is pretty enjoyable but sadly it also involves fucking Deadpool so it can't be perfect.

Another thing that happened is them terraforming Mars and turning it into a planet for the mutants of another island called Akkrao or something like that. I'd get into their whole story but it's pretty convoluted (I mean this is X-Men after all) and I'll probably save that for another time. Oh and Storm is now the leader of Mars, cuz Storm is cool as hell. This has also pissed off several heroes and people like Henry Peter Gyrich is talking them into doing some awful shit. That is not a scene you want to see. No one should be talking to Henry Peter Gyrich, damnit. 

Now you are probably wondering where is the whole yelling at left wingers comes in. Well here it is. Get ready to label me a hardcore conservative now because that's how it works. In X-Factor there was an ungoing mystery about what happened to Prodigy a year before. This issue is where we find out that he was murdered by a racist white man. This got some people on twitter so angry because Leah Williams is a white person and can't write black pain. Yeah, I'm sorry but white people can write black people and there wasn't a damn racist thing in this comic book. Yeah I want more diversity and stuff but I'm sorry sometimes awful shit happens to superheroes. Yeah black people should get to write comics about whatever characters they want but there was not a single iota of racism or bigotry within this comic book. I swear to Christ by the way they were acting I would have expected to see some scene that would make Lucio Fulci squirm but there's nothing there. People are stupid and I hate them. Pigeonholing black people into just writing black people is what made Christopher Priest leave comics for quite some time and that's a fucking shame.

Oh and another thing that happened is that the Scarlet Witch ended up dead. (That also caused them to call Leah Williams anti-romanian and that get her some death threats. Not cool jerks.) and this will lead into the Trial of Magneto. Apparently they retconned Scarlet Witch from being a mutant AND Magnetos daughter because of the movies and what shitty company owned the movie rights to something. I should write a rant about how I'm tired of comic book movies and tv shows putting up the prices up because OH MAN THEY WER EIN THE MOVIE MAN!!!!! I really should do that.

FINAL VERDICT: So yeah, I had a great time reading this story and I want to see where these stories go. I'm very intrigued by whats going to happen. I really like this era of X-Men and I'm really for what will happen next. Maybe I'll even review a new comic without bringing up comicsgate or twitter or any of these smelly turds.