The Final Episode #54: The Brady Bunch (1969 - 1974)

 

I like to keep it relatively upbeat and positive on this silly blog and talk about things that I enjoy. The only time I don't do that is when I want to yell at portnoyd, but sometimes you gotta talk about godawful stuff you never liked. Sometimes its because that stuff stuck with you for decades despite not being popular like Monster By Mistake. Sometimes it was because the stuff was ungodly popular and you couldn't understand why that was so like Friends. Even when I talk about something I don't like I still try to be somewhat positive and at least not make fun of people for like it. It's all silly ass entertainment in the end really. Except if your portnoyd he's wrong about everything and is stupid. That big jerk needs to get his ass kicked by a giant donkey or something equally foolish. I wouldn't have to write awful introductions like this if I was reviewing something I did enjoy now would I. Alas we have to talk about The Brady Bunch.

The Brady Bunch was a tv show that ran for what felt like 82 years but in reality was only 5. From 1969 to 1974. One of those shows that ended in one decade and started in another one. I'm sure one thing that could possibly be interesting is to see how the 1960s ended and the 1970s because well the 1970s. Just because it became 1970 didn't mean styles and ideals and stuff changed. It takes a while for any decade to really find its footing really. You can really see this in this final episode because the clothing is pure 1970s. I kinda find that fascinating really. The main plot of The Brady Bunch was a man marries a woman who has 3 daughters and he has 3 sons. It's pretty much taken from the 1968 film Yours, Mine and Ours with Lucille Ball and I believe Henry Fonda as the parents of like at least 18 kids. Oh and they remade it in the 2000s for Nickelodeon and the remake was very bad. I once went through a phase where I watched all those remakes and reboots from the late 90s and 2000s and they were all mostly not great. People bitching at reboots and remakes forget that Hollywood has always been kinda lazy and will with something that was a hit even if they forget what made that thing a hit in the first place.

Here is the paragraph where I talk about the old memories I have of The Brady Bunch. I'm pretty sure every person who is not Amish has seen this television show. I'm even going to go out of my way and say some Amish people have seen some episodes. It had a lot of episodes to rerun because it was made between 1950 and 1974 because every tv series had a ton of episodes then. I watched it on TBS when it became a part of our cable company and it was on at like 6 o clock. Getting up early to watch anything on weekdays was worth it for me for reasons I don't really want to get into let's just say I didn't like school and getting to see anything before school was worth it. I want to say it replaced Sailor Moon or the Mega Man cartoon which are both better pieces of entertainment than this show. I didn't really like this show but I would get up early to watch it anyway. I was weird. My dad made fun of me saying I was in love with Marsha. My dad is weird. He likes to watch music cd informercials just to listen to the songs they play. He's one of a kind.

That and the one episode of The Brady Bunch where Marsha gets hit in the face with a ball of some kind, I do not remember one thing about The Brady Bunch. Does anyone? I seriously think this may be the least memorable sitcom of all time. I never see many people mention any great moments from this series except for Marsha getting smacked in the face with a ball. I don't even remember the ball. Does anyone? I'm seriously asking because I'm sure you can remember moments from every other sitcom you've seen. Like actually funny moments and not someone getting smacked in the face with a ball. I really am baffled because I believe everyone's seen this show but the only thing that ever gets referenced is Marsha getting hit in the face with a ball. I'd like a fan of this show to actually tell me some memorable moments. It's weird because the same guy who made this Gilligan's Island and that is actually at least memorable.

The Final Episode is just as memorable as the rest of the episodes. This episode involves Bobby Brady the youngest boy getting taken by advisements for hair tonic and buying all of it to resell. He gets Cousin Oliver (people seem to hate this kid but he's honestly just about as interesting as the other kids to me) to buy tonic and fails. Cindy Brady also tries to sell rabbits and ALSO tries to con Cousin Oliver into helping her. She also fails because she ended up buying two male rabbits and they can't make any babies. Oh and Greg Brady uses the tonic and his hair turns orange. I wish they made it look worse because it's only kinda awful looking really.

He ends up going to a Beauty Parlor to get it dyed BUT OH NO two ladies from school see him and they might think he's A FRUITY BOTTOM MAN KISSER and Greg the Stud can't have that so he lies and says his mother is bald. He gets his hair dyed and oh Bobby gets the hair tonic accidently on the rabbits so they get to sell them back to the pet store AND sells the hair tonic so the pet store guy can turn the rabbits orange. Yeah that's it. I got more out of Punky Brewster and Webster and they were fucking clip shows. Oh and Mike Brady doesn't show up because Robert Reed thought this episode's plot was cliché and WOAH holy SHIT man you finally figured that out after 5 years and who knows how many episodes!

FINAL VERDICT: This show was really honestly boring as hell. I really did not enjoy it. I will put this higher than the Power Rangers ending, Everybody Loves Raymond, or the Spider-Man 1967 show but not very much higher. I have a movie where Robert Reed, Mike Brady himself plays a obscene phone caller. I didn't know where else to put that information but I believe people need to know that exists. It's called The Secret Night Caller.