The Final Episode #30: G.I. Joe (1983 - 1986)

 

I always seem to forget that G.I. Joe started two decades earlier than the 1980s. It just slips my mind and I go "oh yeah that's right". One of the times I actually remembered the 1960s toys I asked my old man who would have been like 10 at the time if they ever got any GI Joes and he said he doesn't remember anyone ever playing with those girly dolls! I can't really blame him because it was 1964 and those original toys really do look more doll-like than usual. Anyway G.I. Joe may have started in the 1960s we gotta be completely honest and say it didn't become a crazy super ultra hit until the 1980s reimagining of the toys. I will regale you with a story about those toys in a little bit.

G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero was one of the many Sunbow/Marvel Productions cartoons... which included Transformers and Jem and the Holograms, which I already talked about on this very blog. Also Inhumanoids and Marvel by themselves did Muppet Babies. A really great group of cartoons if you ask me. Also did you know because of like one character Hector Alverez, a silly take on Geraldo Rivera Transformers and Inhumanoids are connected to each other. Oh, Jem and the Holograms were connected together too. I wish they would do a connected universe of movies of all that stuff. who wouldnt want to see The Holograms fight a giant ass monster. I know I do! Sadly because Muppet Babies weren't owned by Hasbro they couldn't join in on the fun, but that would have been one hell of a crossover.

So, I've got to confess that I did not watch much G.I. Joe as a kid. I don't think the series from 1985-1987 was reran that much around here. Unlike a lot of the other popular shows like He-Man that you could still see on TV in the 1980s. I think the only thing related to G.I. Joe that I watched was the DiC cartoon which I see from most people is that it's not a very well liked show. All I've seen is some stills and It defenetly looks like one of the crappier DiC series. Anyway despite this my "friend" Shawn Power, pretty much wanted these old coins my grandfather had given my mother. I gave them to him because he probably forced me to. All of our trades went like that. He got something much better than me. Not because he would beat me up but because he would say he wouldnt be friends or something. Still it was better than most of our trades as G.I. Joe toys are much better than a comic book made by some nobodies. I'd actually like to get that comic again to read it but still. Anyway, my mother was LIVID and we all had to go to the principal's office and had to get the coins back. I do not think I've ever seen my mother that mad ever. Yep, that's the G.I. Joe story. Was it worth it? Probably not.

So The Final Episode of G.I. Joe came about on November 20th, 1986 and was called "Into Your Tent I Will Silently Creep". This episode mostly involves a Joe named "Cross Country" a giant redneck who has a damn confederate flag thing on his belt buckle. I already do not like this guy. All of the Joes give him a hard time for being a stupid redneck asshole, making fun of his country western music (he probably listens to the really awful stuff and not the stuff that was actually pretty good at one point). Meanwhile weird little rat snake creatures are stealing all of the Joe's stuff. like Lady Jaye's hairdryer. And uh Cross Country's shitty little tape recorder. I hate his stupid southern voice and he never even says "I do declare I have a case of the vapors". 

Of course the Rat Snake Creatures are a part of a plan from Cobra Commander, this time trying to make money so that he can get his place back at top of Cobra from Serpentor. Serpentor may have a cool look but Cobra Commander is voiced by Chris Latta so he's clearly the better character. Anyway one of the rat snake creatures stole a CD and the GI Joes feel there's something important on said disk. Cross Country is captured and escapes to find the GI Joes. They fight Cobra Commander and in the end on the disk is just a video game that Mainframe and Dial-Tone (love those names) played on the computer. One Joe goes "Sometimes it doesn't pay to get up in the morning". Gotta love it.

FINAL VERDICT: I did enjoy this episode as it was much better than the messy confusing thrown together shit that was the Transformers ending but I felt the ending to  Jem and the Holograms was much better. Also the comic book done by Larry Hama is way better than any G.I. Joe cartoon. That dude cared so much about this stuff and it shows in the comics. So yeah decent final episode.