Movie Mini Reviews #3: April Fool's Day (1986) & Night of the Scarecrow (1995)

 

Does anyone know where you could buy actual tubs of Popcorn? That to me feels like the best way to enjoy popped corn. I want to own one of those giant popcorn makers movie theaters have. Yes this is probably in the top 3 for worst openings to a blog post anyone could ever make, So you know it's another Mini Movie Review. or Movie Mini Reviews. or whatever the hell I call this crapola. See it eve gets the ola so you know it's extra bad. Anyway you know the drill by now. I discuss two movies that I feel I can't get a full review out of for whatever reason but I still wanna talk about. Since this is October and the Halloween Cool Time Baby For Cool Guys, and Cool Gals, and Cool People of Ambiguous Gender Identity we are gonna talk about two horror films!

This brings me back to the late 90s/early 00s when we got a Jumbo Video close to our house. We'd go there and I'd have a totally different selection of horror crap to rent! I remember renting this movie and watching it on a day off school if I recall correctly. I was not a big fan of it then, and I'd hardly call myself a big fan of it now but I definitely do enjoy it much more now as a sweet ass adult. Anyway the movie involves a bunch of rascals going to a place and getting killed. The difference is that the entire thing is just a April Fool's Day joke (I'm sorry but I'm spoiling this 35 year old motion picture), this movie works because the group of rascals are a bunch of pretty entertaining and enjoyable  people, even if they are incredibly rich white people. One of them is named Muffy which made me think of this movie having the characters from the PBS kids show Arthur doing the same stuff they did in this movie and that made me laugh because I'm a fucking weirdo. I was reminded of Arthur because one of the characters was named Muffy. Do you think anyone in this world has ever been named Muffy? Anyway this is a bit of a slow moving burn but I don't mind. You get a great cast including Amy Steel from Friday the 13th Part 2 (most attractive Final Girl in that franchises history I don't care what you say jerks) and Biff from Back to the Future (most attractive character in that franchise's history I don't care what you say jerks) and It's got a lot of pretty good scares. I personally enjoy the moment in the well with the 3 bodies and the lady who fell in. Good shit. I will give this one a Recommended.

I don't know what the fuck was up with my younger self and movies. If I ever gain the ability to time travel I will one.) Kick his stupid fat ass for getting so fat and two.) kick his stupid fat ass for ever saying anything bad about this movie. I do not understand HOW I didn't think this movie was the most amazing thing ever filmed, but enough of that. I'll give you many reasons why this movie is so badass you need to go find it at a movie rental store that barely even exist anymore. It's THAT good. Firstly, you get a killer scarecrow. Scarecrows are fucking cool, doesn't matter if they live in Oz or they want to cut your face up. Scarecrows are fucking cool. So giving us a Scarecrow is a really good idea. They are weirdly underrated and many of the movies involving Scarecrows are really bad. Secondly, this movie has several really fun character actors in the movie, Stephen Root (from NewsRadio, King of the Hill and Office Space) as a sheriff AND Bruce Glover (yes Crispin Glover's daddy) as a priest. They do great and are always wonderful to see. In fact everyone in this movie is really pretty good in their roles and are mostly likable (except the jerk character that all of these movies are legally required to have). Thirdly the death scenes are god damn insane. A man gets magical scarecrow straw put on him and he just turns into straw! There's one I don't want to even mention anything involved with because you gotta see it to believe it. It's amazing. This is a incredibly fun movie by Mr. Jeff Burr (who I've already talked about on this blog. I will probably end up talking about him again.) Very Highly Super Recommended.

That's it. Go away.