Comic Review #24: Deadpool #11 (who the fuck cares when this shit came out)

 

Well portnoyd did it! He got me to read a Deadpool comic! I hope his dirty asshole is happy! I know it's dirty because he never cleans it. You gotta do that portnoyd! You see he opened up his own blog here where he wrongly and incorrectly trashed several soul touchingly good What If comics along with Namor! Namor is one of the greatest characters in the Marvel Universe and I will never listen to anyone trashing him! I love asshole jerk heroes and he's the absolute best! So now I have to correct these wrongs and talk about a comic that actually sucks shit which is why I'm talking about Deadpool.

I fucking hate the character of Deadpool. Fucking hate the son of a useless fuck. There aren't many comic book characters I actually would say I hate but Deadpool is on that short list. His LOL SO WACKY RANDOM HAHAHA comedy is the most forced LOL SO WACKY comedy ever. Absurdist wacky comedy can work but only in the right hands and not a single person who has ever written this character has done it right. Not the ones I've heard of and not the ones I know diddly fuck about like this Joe Kelly guy here. I hate Deadpool so much. It doesn't help that I hate his creator Rob Liefeld so much because he's a big dingus baby, but the reasons people like Deadpool were done by other people so I can't even blame Rob and I WANT TO BE ABLE TO DO THAT! 

I can't even take the scenes where this character is supposed to be serious well serious because there's probably a scene of him shitting his pants or talking about how he wants to fuck Bea Arthur taking place in the same damn issue. It's impossible to take anything that happens with him seriously because he's LOL IM JOKING ALL THE TIME AND IM WACKY!!!!! HAHAHAH WONDERFUL!

So what is this horseshit comic about anyway? Deadpool and Blind Al go back in time and be wacky in an old issue of Spider-Man! OH MAN DEADPOOL SAID NORMAN OSBORN HAS WEIRD HAIR WHAT A CLEVER JOKE THAT WASN'T DATED BY 30 FUCKING YEARS THE SECOND THIS BAG OF SHIT COMIC CAME OUT!

I don't want to talk about any more of this shit except that it annoyed me. I'd rather read all 7 of those What If's one hundred times in a row than read another Deadpool pile of shit comic. So port wins because I'm annoyed now. Fuck port and fuck this comic. In the ear.

FINAL VERDICT: Every single comic book character ever is better than Deadpool and every single comic book that doesn't have Deadpool in it is better than a comic with Deadpool in it. I will not be talking about any more comics with this shitty asshole fucker in them because he annoys me that much. Don't ask it won't happen. Awful. Trash. Garbage. SHIT.